Sunday, May 22, 2011

.flickers through city lights.

.memories of you come like stabs of pain
ebb and flow
fireworks in the night sky don't mean what they used to
they startle me

what about you? Are you hurting?
every time I think about how I'm over you
twenty-four hours later, I find myself wanting to cry
not like I cry for you, not that I want you back
just that every time I look to that place in my heart
the one that was taken by you
all I find is emptiness
and I want something back

what if I had answered that one letter differently?
I turn around and a spark of light catches my eye
caught by something that was once part of you
and once belonged to me
now it lies, collecting dust
i'll keep it with me tomorrow
i'll keep it under my pillow
you know I won't

I see a silhouette
leaning against a wall, his arm outstretched
he's wearing a navy blue hoodie, sleeves rolled up to the elbows
strong, tan arm, the silver kara, a red thread around the wrist...
Images. flashes of a similar arm
around me
turn away now. don't look. don't think. ugh, this sucks
slide shows with a dark-set background play in fast forward
every time something related to you invades my mind
all I need is a replacement for that space of yours. something that is hard to find

this doesn't feel like a me who was ever someone's lover
but I see flickers of the times I was
and I look into me to salvage that piece of me again
do we wish to know what we left behind?
the phrase "you complete me" comes to mind
but you never did
isn't that why we left?

and yet again, I reconfirm my theory
even though it was just to try and prove it wrong
memories. stabs of pain.
ebb and flow. I have to let go
but of what?.

No comments:

Post a Comment